Care Doesn’t Expire: Why Moms Need Support in Every Season

A reflection from Kim Richards, Founder of Caring for Mama, on why moms need care at every stage, and simple ways to support ourselves and each other through the changing seasons of motherhood.

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There’s a subtle belief that once we’re out of the postpartum phase, we should be fine. That when our babies sleep through the night, when we stop pumping or packing a diaper bag, we magically have more space for ourselves.

But here’s what I’ve learned: motherhood doesn’t stop asking, it just changes how it asks. And the need for care? That doesn’t go away. It evolves right alongside us.

In the early days, care might look like sleep, meals dropped at the door, and someone holding the baby so we can cry or shower. But in later seasons like toddler chaos, school schedules, teen emotional gymnastics and graduations, we need care in different ways. We need boundaries, breathers, people who check in. We need permission to not always be “on.” We still need softness.

One thing I’ve noticed - in myself and in other moms - is the quiet pressure to “have it all figured out” the further we get into motherhood. It’s rarely something we say out loud, but we feel it. In how we hesitate to ask for help. In how we measure ourselves against what we think other moms are doing.

We internalize this unspoken message that if we’re not in the newborn fog anymore, we should be fine. But that only adds pressure to a role that already stretches us in every direction. Just because our kids are older or the chaos looks different doesn’t mean we’re not still carrying a lot. The emotional load grows and shifts, and so does our need for care.

So what does care look like now, when time is short and your to-do list is long? Sometimes it’s a full exhale moment. But more often, it’s in the small, doable things that help you feel a little more human.

Here are a few gentle ways to care for yourself (and other moms in your life) right now:

1. Ask yourself what you need without judgment.
   Even if the answer is “quiet,” “a snack,” or “someone to listen,” naming it matters. Your needs aren’t too much.

2. Add five quiet minutes to something you’re already doing.
   For me, that often looks like a slower breakfast, a quiet moment at lunch, or stretching before bed. It doesn’t have to be a new routine, just a softer version of the one you already have.

3. Swap “checking in” texts with mom friends for real connection.
   Instead of “how are you?” try, “how’s your heart today?” or “what’s been hardest this week?” Be the one who goes first - it invites depth in both directions.

4. Gift care without occasion.
   Leave a note on a friend's porch. Send a snack or soak to someone having a hard day. The best gifts aren’t timed, they’re felt.

5. Let softness lead.
   On days when everything feels sharp or rushed, ask: How can I be 10% gentler with myself right now? That’s care, too.

Here’s what I always say: Motherhood doesn’t get easier. It gets different.

And that difference means our needs don’t go away, they just shift. Even when things feel more manageable in some ways, it doesn’t mean they’re not still hard in others.

That’s why we have to keep making space to pause. To rest. To listen.

To tune into ourselves - what we want, what we need, what we care about - not just once, but moment by moment, day by day, season by season.

Because the truth is, we deserve care in every version of motherhood.
Not just when it’s hard.
Not just when we break down.
Always.